Thursday, January 30, 2014
Is it Friday yet????
I think it's just a lot of things going on all at the same time. End of the month is a busy time for me at work because metrics and meetings take over my life. Working really hard and getting no where fast, kind of like running on a treadmill. I'm sure I'm still getting some sort of benefit that I'm not aware of yet, but right now it is really challenging to stay motivated. There is a lot of uncertainty with rumors flying around about changes in the business, plus performance reviews and promotions and bonusable goal review and goal setting for the new year. I'm trying to stay positive because I know I crushed my goals last year, but I'm also trying to stay realisistic because I know how rating calibration meetings tend to go and I doubt I will get what I think I should get.
I'm trying to do something good, raising money for cancer research and thinking of all kinds of different creative ways to do it and incentives for people that wouldn't normally donate, and most of the time it is well received and supported, but occasionally it's not and it's that small fraction of the population that really gets under my skin and irritates me. It's ok if people are not interested in giving or can't afford to or already gave to another cause or any number of reasons that prevent people from donating. Then there's people that give, but reluctantly and make me feel like a jerk for asking as if I'm stealing the money from them for personal use or something.
I'm also planning a really cool fundraising event for next week, but trying to remind people to register for it and organize potential raffle items and worrying about whether or not I will have enough things and if the event will be a success and raise much money is weighing pretty heavily on me. I am trying to resist the urge to spend my own money to supply raffle items because I end up doing too much. I want it to be fun and raise money, but I need to just relax and just enjoy the event and stop worrying so much. It IS going to be great and I know everyone that is coming supports me and the cause I am running for and at the end of the night they will all have a good time no matter what raffle items are there.
So, Friday cannot come soon enough and once this weekend and next Tuesday's event are behind me, I really hope that the stress is behind me too. I need to start focusing on training for Boston and start mentally preparing for it. I LOVE those 26.2 miles and I want to really soak it in and appreciate every mile. Not just in Boston, but every step along the way. I need to remind myself that I have come so far and my journey has been filled with ups and downs much like the roads from Hopkinton to that stretch on Boylston street, the first part was mostly downhill and it hurt a lot and beat me up, but I turned and pulled myself up and in many ways I have experienced the pain and glory of crossing the finish line. Just like in the race, in life the journey doesn't end there, you keep moving forward.